18 responses

  1. Erin Sullivan
    August 27, 2016

    I am in a cohabitation arrangement. We broke up about two months ago. He has cut off all communication with me. I don’t want to be mean but I got my own place and will be moving in on the 6th of September. What do I have a right to take? We have purchased all of our housewares together like dishes and the Keurig, lawn furniture. We both bought stuff here and there. Do I have a right to take anything? He actually said I only have my clothes but it’s not true! I don’t want anymore unnecessary drama. I can’t see myself moving into my new place without the silverware I chose. It may seem futile but it’s been very nerve wracking.

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      August 29, 2016

      I don’t know what you have a right to take, and you can discuss that with an attorney. But there is a saying that possession is nine point of the law ….. just saying.

      Reply

  2. Quinn
    September 15, 2016

    Anything under $500 in theory you can just take. That’s what I did. I took 95% of the kitchen stuff. I left enough plates, silverware, a few drink glassware and anyhting we had extra off like cutting boards. I would take all the furniture – you should leave a little.

    Reply

    • Quinn
      September 15, 2016

      Sorry meant to type take some furniture not all of it

      Reply

  3. T
    September 20, 2016

    Although my soon to be ex-husband makes a large amount of money, we have few assets, monetarily or otherwise. However, we have a substantial retirement. Would it be wise to settle for a lump sum in the form of retirement, and then cash out the portion that I need for living expenses? I think that I can withdraw from retirement at the time of divorce without penalty?

    Thanks in advance for any advice you can offer.

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      November 22, 2016

      If the retirement funds are in his name, you will need a Qualified Domestic Relations Order to transfer the funds to an IRA in your name. You can ask that a portion of the funds be paid directly to you rather than going into your IRA, and you will have to pay tax on those funds, though there is no penalty.

      Reply

  4. Kellie McDowell, CFA, CDFA
    November 22, 2016

    Just be aware that on the lump sum payment that you can affect the deductibility of the spousal support if the payments drop by more than $15,000 during the first three years. I think a one time payment will trigger recapture for the payor.

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      November 22, 2016

      Kellie is right regarding lump sum payments of taxable/deductible alimony. That is why we usually structure such payments as non-taxable/non-deductible alimony payments, so that he doesn’t get a deduction and you don’t pay tax. That way there is no “recapture” issue.

      Reply

  5. joyce
    January 12, 2017

    I have been married for 33 years it has been a bad marriage for many years. I stay because I depend in my husbands checks . I am a stay at home mom. do to not being able to work out side the house. I do daycare but if I was to leave I would have to start over. I don’t make much. And he carries all are insurance and retirement.my children are grown but still live with us and go to school. my husband would quit his job if I was to leave and we would have nothing what am I to do

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      January 12, 2017

      Talk to an attorney about your husband’s duty to support his family. Quitting his job to spite you is probably not an option in your state.

      Reply

  6. Kathy J Cohen
    June 2, 2017

    I owned a mobile home and he was buying land. We married n he was sole provider. We put in septic electric well n concrete pad. We then put my home there. Now a divorce. He’s self employed n works cash deals and hides his money at his mother’s. He’s been abusive but he filed. There is an order of protection. Land has two separate addresses. He has a pole barn on one lot my home on other. It appears we will be going to trial. He wants me to move but doesn’t want to pay. I have no income and haven’t in the whole marriage. My attorney asked for $23,000 and 6mo spousal support. He turned it down. Pretends he has no money. What will judge Grant?

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      June 5, 2017

      Talk to your attorney about what you can expect in court. You never know what a judge will do until they do it.

      Reply

  7. Mark
    January 23, 2018

    I have married my spouse last year, but due to some differences we would like to get separated. Is it compulsory that i should pay alimony? If my wife says that she does not require it, can the court consider it?

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      January 24, 2018

      Contact an attorney to find out what the laws are in your state. It is doubtful you would be on the hook for alimony for very long in such a short marriage. And of course, if she waives alimony, then it isn’t an issue.

      Reply

  8. Liza
    March 18, 2018

    Been married five years with a one year old. We own a house both name on the deed and mortgage. We wants me to leave. I’m not leaving without my son. Should I stay until we see attorneys? I have a full time job but he makes much more money and pays the mortgage and car note. Advise?

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      March 18, 2018

      You’ll need to talk to an attorney — we aren’t attorneys and don’t know the law in your state.

      Reply

  9. Dino
    March 21, 2018

    My x and I agreed to sell the house which should end up with $200k in equity to split 50/50. In determining Alimony need could I argue that the $100k in equity she is getting should be considered? Whats the need for her if she has 100k in the bank? I was hoping to use this like a lump sum payout for at least partial alimony.

    Reply

    • Ginita Wall, CPA, CFP®
      March 21, 2018

      It sounds as though the house belongs to both of you, so you are each getting your half. Certainly if you are giving her your half of the equity as well, you could count that as a lump sum alimony payout. But if she’s just getting half, that’s what she owns as property. To the extent that those funds are available to invest, the earnings from them would be counted as funds she has to support herself, but I doubt the funds themselves would be counted.

      Reply

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